Dreams, Darkness, Small Computers and ongoing projects

It's been a strange time of late. I've found myself dreaming of another future. One that doesn't include my current family unit. Can I really remove myself from all this without huge pain and suffering for all. And all in the name of my happiness? Who knows! What I do know is how shocked so many people would be if I split from my wife. Her family, my family, her friends, my friends, our friends. But when all is said and done, I've just not been getting enough satisfaction from my life recently. And I am not sure if recently means months or years. What glimpses I have had of a potentially better future just seem elusive and intangible. So much to undo. Maybe I am not capable of having one of those lives... Poppycock! Yep, I am right proper confused. And just to complicate things further, my work has started to piss me off a bit too. Though I do have a new possibility of further employment on the horizon. Fingers crossed.

On a lighter note I have recently become obsessed with finding a elusive Asus Eeepc to use as my secondary laptop. Yes, I really do need one. It's 200 quid and runs Skype for goodness sake! And when you're away as much as me and always lugging a laptop around, this little gem seems like the perfect antidote. Well, I have one on order, a little above the original RRP, but what the heck. Maybe this will bring me some happiness if other things can't.

I am continuing my Star Wars project, along with my Blade Runner split screen analysis. Albeit very slowly. But to be honest I find it hard to get motivated with these non profit making ventures. Maybe once they are complete I will be able to get on with the Raiders project. Something that would give me the at least some pleasure. And in the same year that Indy 4 is being released. There's something quite satisfying about that idea. Life is a roller coaster after all.

2nd Baby Due

Recognise that bump? Yep, we are expecting our second baby... yesterday to be precise. We were both under the impression that second babies come quicker.  Well our first came on her due date so already we know the old wives tale isn't always true.  

Preparations have been made. The spare room decorated (a while ago actually) in a neutral yellow.  Though the fact is that the 20 week scan pretty much revealed that we are expecting another girl.  At two and a half our first is very excited about the whole thing.  Particularly because she's been told (by her mum) that the baby will bring her a couple of presents when she arrives.  Our attempt to soften the blow.  Though how long a purple Barbie and a pushchair will last in the midst of all that screaming, I don't know.

Life has become rather complicated of late.  My feelings for my wife aren't what they used to be and I am going through a bit of a crisis where that's all concerned. I'm just not sure that this is all I want from life anymore. To add to the stress, we were told yesterday that we have to move out of our rented house.  But every cloud has a silver lining.  We may return down south to be nearer family (read babysitters) to make things a bit easier.

Ciao for now.

Returning to Jedi Complete

The follow up to 'Building Empire', 'Returning to Jedi' is complete.

Building Empire Documentary

Well, it's finished. After eight months of hard work, I have scaled the biggest learning curve to challenge me for some time.

Building Empire is a complementary commentary for The Empire Strikes Back. In a similar vein to 'Deleted Magic', the film takes you on a tour of the making of the second Star Wars movie. With insights from cast and cew via audio commentary and video clips from a multitude of behind the scenes sources, Building Empire is is Star Wars doco to beat all Star Wars docos (at least I like to think it is!).

Head over to for more info.

Our Baby!!

Well, after some stress and strain, mostly on my wife's part, out beautiful daughter was born on 1st September 2005. On what was one of the years hottest days (and nights!).

Now nearly 6 months old she is continuing to delight us on a daily basis. She is just so cute and so funny and we love her to bits. It was all a bit of a culture shot to start with. I never really expected the sleep deprivation to be so hard on us. Now I can understand why it's used as torture under some regimes!

Anyway, sufficed to say - she's a beauty and we are loving being parents!

Pregnancy Woes

My wife is pregnant with our first child. We are both very happy but pregnancy is not what either of us expected. Almost immediately after the initial excitement J was sick for 18 weeks. An unexpected and unwelcome beast, chronic nausia meant that J was practically imobile for the duration. Apart from the frequent run to the nearest recepticle of course.

Months later the sickness has gone but J is now suffering from SPD, a pelvic disorder which makes difficult work of walking, driving, turning over in bed and makes other more physical activites almost impossible.

We have 6 weeks until the due date and things have really geared up. The nursery is finished, the classes have been attended and items, many items, have been purchased.

Now we wait for the fun to begin and I am really looking forward to it!

Making a Short Film

Like most people who have done a media course, I too had to write, direct and shoot a short film. My MPT BSc asked quite a bit, particularly as there were only two of us left on the course. So along with my friend, and only other surviving member TS, we wrote, shot, starred in, directed and edited a short film. It eventually ended up as a 40 minute 'Making of' feature with outtakes and a music Video. The actual film "KICK" that 'the making of' referred to was never made. But the concept of making a 'making of' (if you catch my drift) was received quite well. Shouts of "genius", "great idea" and "lazy bugger" are all true.  In the end it earned me a near 1st 2:1!

Looking back at this with my friends RS and RM at the weekend (they had been lucky enough not to see it before), we got talking about making a short film. My suggestion was to make a one minute movie for the BBC one minute movie site.

Although my wife is expecting our first baby , I am determined to produce something at some point this year. I will gladly write, shoot and edit again, but I just need that first spark of imagination first... Bugger, where did my thinking cap go? I think it's in the 1990's along with my brain...

AFI George Lucas Tribute

Thanks to my good friends over at originaltrilogy, I watched the AFI George Lucas Tribute last night. Whilst my views of Georgie-boy have been less than rosey since 1997, it's clear that the man has done some great things in his life. Not least giving me and thousands of other the interest in film that has sparked the initiative to work in TV/Film.

Whilst the tribute was cheesy in places it was also pretty emotional and occassionaly bloody funny: see Carrie Fisher's 'Tribute' and Harrison Ford telling a few home truths. Harrison certainly does seem to have a new lease of life. And I admit, I did give out a small "whoop" of delight when he said he was keen to do Indy 4!

I am soon to pass this little gem onto my friend RS who has a similar love for all things Star Wars (well nearly all!)

Ciao for now